How Delusional People Expect Love To Be

[caption id="attachment_832713" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Close up portrait of young woman outside leaning against wall daydreaming[/caption] Most romantic comedies over the last five years have, fortunately, caught up to the realities of committed relationships. Love is not exactly accurately depicted in “The Way We Were” but is quite well explained in movies like “Knocked up” where the leading man is too busy with his bong to realize there is an earthquake, let alone that his pregnant girlfriend (yup, girlfriend and not wife) could be in danger. But they still love each other. And they still have sex. But the sex is awkward sometimes, and there is a lot of discussing the practicalities of the position, and sometimes sex just ends in an argument. That is love. And it’s okay! It’s fun and it’s messy and it’s gross and it’s awkward. Life is those things and since, hopefully, you can handle all areas of life with your beloved, then love should be all of those things too. But if you’ve only watched and read romances of yesteryear, you could be confused. Here are ideas of love the delusional have. [caption id="attachment_697102" align="alignleft" width="423"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Mind reading

Your partner will always know when you’re teeming with anger across the room, and miserable when everybody around you is having a great time. Not so. Your partner will often be oblivious to the emotions that you think are obvious. And it doesn’t mean you’re no longer meant to be; it just means he isn’t a psychic.         [caption id="attachment_712126" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Emotionally charged sex

Sure, some sex will be emotionally charged. But a lot of it will be routine and mechanical. Plenty of it will just be to “get one in” because you haven’t in four days. Don’t worry about it—this happens to the greatest of love stories (you just don’t see that part).       [caption id="attachment_697220" align="alignleft" width="468"] Shutterstock.com/Candlelight dinner[/caption]

Big date nights, every date night

Every date night will involve your boo remembering some intricate detail of the first time you met and flowers that are very hard to find and an elaborate meal, right? Nuh-uh. You will get tired and busy and you’ll be touched if your partner defrosts a lasagna and puts it on “the nice plates.”         [caption id="attachment_721333" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Engaging conversations nightly

Not all conversations will be about philosophy, the meaning of life, your goals and dreams and your childhoods. A lot of conversations will be about how your coworker finally stopped chewing loudly, the landlord is sending pest control over tomorrow and it’s your turn to buy toilet paper.       [caption id="attachment_707441" align="alignleft" width="600"] Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Hourly expression of feelings

In the first few months you may text and call each other as often as you can to tell each other, “I love you,” “I miss you,” and “I don’t know what I’d do without you.” But eventually you won’t do that as often, and that’s okay. You should still know you love each other. [caption id="attachment_703170" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll tell each other everything

You’ll share your deepest darkest secrets, your most embarrassing thoughts, and your shameful desires, right? Believe it or not, you may find there are some things you don’t feel comfortable telling your soul mate. That doesn’t mean he’s no longer your soul mate.       [caption id="attachment_701208" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Constantly craving their presence

It’s hard to believe there could ever be a time you wouldn’t want your beloved by your side. But when you actually stick it out through a multi-year relationship, you’ll see that sometimes you do need space from the love of your life. That doesn’t mean the end is near.       [caption id="attachment_621135" align="alignleft" width="422"] Corbis Images[/caption]

You’ll find every flaw adorable

This may come as a shock if you’ve been taught to believe that everything is a sign but, you actually can find someone’s nose hair disgusting, and still want to spend your life with him. Likewise, he can tease you for your weird laugh and still think you’re the one.       [caption id="attachment_702872" align="alignleft" width="426"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Everyone else will love him

Here’s another myth perpetuated by a lot of shows and movies—that your friends and family will love the right guy for you. If they don’t, he’s not the right guy. NOT TRUE. Millions of couples around the world live happily, with friends and family members who don’t 100 percent approve.     [caption id="attachment_701807" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Never needing to apologize

Again, your partner cannot read your mind. He cannot feel how sorry you are and he cannot guess that you’ve learned your lesson. Furthermore, he’s not such a big person that he doesn’t need an apology—he does.         [caption id="attachment_714215" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll never flirt with another man

You’ll be so consumed by thoughts of your partner that you won’t even be able to see other men right? That’s a cute thought—a flawed one, but cute. Even your perfect person won’t appeal to every single tiny aspect of your personality. You’ll still run into guys who just get the rare corners of your mind your partner doesn’t, and you’ll end up flirting with them. That doesn’t mean you should leave your partner for them. [caption id="attachment_821722" align="alignleft" width="900"] Credit: Bigstock[/caption]

Being energetically in sync

You’ll always be so thrilled to be around each other that you’ll energize one another, even if you haven’t slept in days, right? Or, you’ll be sleepy at exactly the same times, isn’t that true? Not at all. There will be times you are totally on board for a party and your partner will want nothing to do with it. [caption id="attachment_702781" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Loving all the same things

Don’t go running for the hills or rethinking your entire life when this happens: your one true love may absolutely hate your favorite movie, he may gag at your favorite food, and he may have zero interest in your favorite artist. But relationships don’t survive on those things; they survive on common values.     [caption id="attachment_703812" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Loving all the same people

Your partner may not love all of your friends, either. He may find the one you consider eccentric and quirky annoying and abrasive. And you might not be fond of his friend! But you love each other, and that’s what counts.         [caption id="attachment_614093" align="alignleft" width="424"] Corbis[/caption]

Receiving major sacrifices

You may have some visions of a guy who would move across the country for you, give up his job for you, and give you his kidney. In your daydreams about love, your partner would do anything for you.         [caption id="attachment_608142" align="alignleft" width="420"] Corbis[/caption]

Having to make no sacrifices

For some reason, part of your visions of love don’t involve you making sacrifices. Au contraire—they involve a man who insists you never change a thing and will sacrifice his happiness to make you happy.             [caption id="attachment_609640" align="alignleft" width="420"] Corbis[/caption]

Hanging on each other’s every word

Your partner’s ears to your words will be like a moth to a flame; he’ll think every word that comes out of your mouth is gold and he’ll want to catch every piece. Right?! Ugh. Nope. There will be days you both just don’t have the brain capacity to listen to another person speak for one more minute.       [caption id="attachment_720626" align="alignleft" width="490"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll gladly take care of each other

Don’t get me wrong; your perfect person will take care of you when you’re depressed or ill. But to believe he will be thrilled to do it and enjoy every minute of it is another issue. He is only human; sometimes he’ll wish he could go out drinking with his friends if he’s stayed in consoling you for a week. [caption id="attachment_709038" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll never fight

This is a very dangerous belief. If you’re a fan of “Friends” then you’ve seen the episode where Chandler reveals he thought the first fight of a relationship had to mean you break up. Don’t be Chandler.           [caption id="attachment_704914" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll always agree on the big things

Like how to spend money and how to raise children? Ha. Those will be the things you fight the most about. But at the end of the day, if you can laugh together, agree on how people deserve to be treated and just get each other, it’ll all work out.

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